World in Briefs by Kevin Dunne.
While the citizens of earth were going about their daily routines last Sunday, Felix Baumgartner was preparing to fall through the stratosphere. On top of having a totally rad name, Baumgartner broke several world records, most notably freefalling at 833.9 mph, which is faster than the speed of sound. This record has impressed the likes of both David Bowie and Tom Petty. The 128,000 leap was sponsored by Red Bull and a live stream was provided, mainly to show that an energy drink company has a better space program than most countries.
The grass isn’t always greener on the other side, especially for Michael Foster and Susan Cooper. The British couple was recently sentenced to three years in the chokey for growing and selling cannabis. In a quasi-Breaking Bad fashion (emphasis on the quasi), the couple had been dealing weed for the past 6 years and sending the proceeds to Kenyan villages. The money was used to pay for children’s education, cover medical expenses, and support the local hospital. A simple twist of fate led to the discovery of the couple’s operation when an officer recognized a distinct smell coming from the house where the weed was grown. It is bit suspicious that the officer recognized the smell so distinctly, but that tidbit seems to have been overlooked…
Apparently in Germany, having a conscious can be a criminal offense. Cornelia Gebhard-Schollwoeck, a Frankfurt resident, was fined $3327 for recycling. After a glass collection truck was blocked by construction,the real-life Captain Planet snapped into action and began collecting the bottles that littered the playground near her home. Schollwoeck was soon cited for illegal trash disposal, which is apparently a thing.
When “Wildman” Phil Rakoci left his car running in a Walmart parking lot in Colorado last Thursday while he went to go grab some supplies, he was shocked (especially since he left the keys in the ignition) to discover that somebody had stolen his car. Rakoci left his car running and unattended out of partial stupidity and in order to keep the reptiles that he was keeping in his Suburban warm. Rakoci makes a living by going to schools and educating kids about animals and reptiles, so the carjacker is in for quite a hairy surprise. The 3-legged tortoise, Burmese python, rattlesnake, 5 snakes, 3 scorpions, 5 lizards, gecko, 2 turtles, and tarantula that Rakoci left to guard his vehicle weren’t enough to deter the carjacker, mainly because they were all kept in tubs. The cold-blooded criminal has yet to return any of the creatures and police are on the lookout for Rakoci’s vehicle.