If you have ever wandered the eclectic and germ-infested aisles of a Goodwill, you’re bound to see three very common things in each store: A couch that smells like someone just blew smoke on it all day, stuffed animals covered in lice, and Christian eschatology books; namely the infamous Left Behind series. You can find the entire series neatly stacked next to every Tom Clancy book known to man and an unknown romance novel. I myself am a fan of the Left Behind series and not because it’s comprised of sixteen books. Whoever had the idea to turn it into a film series had a lot of work to do. So in 2000 Cloud Ten Productions hired Kirk Cameron and released a God-awful film trilogy based on the series. You would think that Kirk Cameron would be able to bump up the credibility of any Christian film but unfortunately it takes something called good writing/directing/editing/special-effects to make a film worthy of our short attention spans. So twelve years later, the same production company thought it would be in their best interest to remake their mistake. So in order to right their wrongs they hired Nicolas Cage, Ashley Tisdale, and Chad Michael Murray to star in their remake.
Mistake #1: Allowing a low-budget Christian film company to make a movie about a global rapture.
Mistake #2: Nicolas Cage
Mistake #3, 4 and 5: Ashley Tisdale.
Really? Ashley Tisdale, who is best known for her work on the High School Musical Trilogy and Chad Michael Murray who is known for that soap opera about a tree? I don’t mean to be mean, but really Cloud Ten?
Not to harp on Nicolas Cage because he’s had some really solid films (Raising Arizona and National Treasure anyone?) I just don’t know if casting Balthazar from The Sorcerer’s Apprentice in an apocalyptic Christian film is going to help. Not to mention the series author, Tim LaHaye, told Christian Post he hates the script.
‘It’s probably the worst script I’ve ever read,’ LaHaye told CP. ‘And I’ve read scores of them. The plot line is nothing like the book. The only thing they retain are the names of the people, and maybe places,’ LaHaye added. ‘There is no redemptive value to this movie,’ he continued, while acknowledging that ‘it’s got a lot of intrigue.’
It’s going to take more than intrigue to salvage the already poor street credit this film has attained. Production will take place this Spring and will be released later this year or early 2014. Hopefully Jesus will come back before then.
Prediction: Nicolas Cage will become the anti-Christ by selling his soul to the devil and becoming the Ghost Rider.