Written and Media by Denee Menghini and Special Correspondent Katie Filby.
Recently the Papyrus launched an investigation into the ever so mysterious side of Greenville College’s new first couple. While it has been marvelous having Ivan and Kathie Filby back on GC’s campus, one would be lying if they said they never sensed the couple had something to hide. In order to get to the bottom of our suspicions we enlisted the help of Papyrus special correspondent and first daughter, Katie Filby.
The results of our investigation ranged from humorous to downright scandalous (see number 3). While Katie was unable to comment extensively on the information she provided, many conclusions can be drawn about the first couple in light of these discoveries.
- Ivan still has one baby tooth – This explains Ivan’s boyish charm. Apparently he’s not just a child at heart, but also a child in molars.
- Ivan is a big Bruce Springsteen fan – This is not as much shocking as it is appropriate. Last time I checked, all presidents are required to listen to “The Boss.” It helps pump them up.
- Kathie sold jeans on the black market – Very few details are known about this incident. When asked for further information Katie admitted, “That’s actually all I know. I think she sold some Bibles too.”
- Ivan once had green hair and was in a rock band – Dr. Filby was a professor here at the same time that a punk version of the GC Alma Mater was produced. Possible connections to the event are unclear. Investigators are still working on photographic evidence of the green hair.
- Ivan’s favorite book is The Great Gatsby – While many students only know Leonardo DiCaprio as
Gatsby, it appears as though our new president prefers the print version of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s classic.
- Kathie speaks Russian, Spanish, French, and English – Most of us knew Kathie as Spanish professor, before she became “first babe” of Greenville. The fact that she also speaks Russian and French can only mean one thing. She’s a secret agent.
- Ivan is an excellent inventor/teller of stories – Most of us have had the opportunity to hear Ivan speak, but if you have not you are definitely missing out. I am almost positive that if you just walk up to Ivan and ask him to tell you a story, he would more than likely oblige.
- Kathie is friends with Bono – The list of the Filby’s famous friends is actually pretty extensive, but Kathie’s connection to Bono goes way back. The two knew each other in college. Sources tell me that the AgapeFest staff is doing their best to milk this connection for all its worth.
- Ivan can annoyingly poke you in four different ways – This is the type of hard-hitting facts that can only come from a news correspondent who is also the subject’s child. Clearly Katie is speaking from experience, but I wouldn’t put it past Ivan to try this on students. A good incentive for staying on his good side.
- Ivan’s favorite movie is Elf – It is really exciting to know our new president has excellent taste in movies. And if you love Elf too, you will have the opportunity to watch it with Ivan and Kathie this
Saturday night at 8:30 in the DC.
Special thanks to Papyrus special correspondent Katie Filby for helping us all gain a better understanding of the first couple. Also, be sure to go out and support the Filbys this Thursday at all of the inaugural events. President Filby has gone to great lengths to make sure all the events are student friendly, and he would love to see you there. A full schedule is available at greenville.edu. #iHeartIvan