Stunnington Lands a Lady

Media by Betsy Wagoner and Brittney Gilleland

Written by Brittney Gilleland and Betsy Wagoner. Media by Brittney Gilleland and Betsy Wagoner.


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There’s no doubt that every lady on this campus has swooned over Dr. Dunnington at some point in their 4 year career here. The way he slings that satchel over his shoulder and struts himself across Scott Field in that plaid button up with the fleece vest could make even the most anti ring-by-spring girl change her mind. His smile brightens up Whitlock and his soothing, rich voice makes a discussion on Socrates and Plato sound 10 times more interesting than it actually is.
And now that all the ladies reading this have pictured themselves talking Kierkegaard with this man, it’s time to break the sad news. It’s true, Dr. Dun Dun has landed himself a lady. Oh, you mean you haven’t heard that Kate Middleton and Prince William have split up? There was some weird talk that it was about a sketchy incident that happened in Parliament, but anyone who knows anything about Kent Dunnington obviously knows the real truth.
You remember how recently all of the religion profs took a trip to “California?” Kent may have just hopped himself on a plane over to Europe and had a nice little encounter with the Princess himself instead of attending that seminar. When she was strolling about with little baby Prince George along the Thames River, she happened to look up and see his stunning (get it!?) face.
As they walked around, it was apparent to young Kate that while she loved her life at the palace, and being a princess was probably the best job that she could ever get,  she knew that God had placed her in Kent’s way at the most perfect time.
They talked for hours about Kent’s Methods class and the passion that he had for teaching college aged kids. Kate asked him if he had ever taught or been around younger kids, and with that crooked little smile he told her about the countless hours he volunteered in the church nursery. Right then she was hooked. She knew that Kent would rock-a-bye baby George, and that was her chance to get that rock and say bye to William.
They arrived back in Greenville just in time to have their dream winter wedding. With Reverend Ruth Huston officiating and Dr. Brian Hartley as the best man, everything was perfect. The princess, Kent, and little George are now living happily every after.
So watch out Kathie Filby, because some other royalty is trying to step in and take your place! #GodSaveTheQueen


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